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Posts by David McFadden

Beautiful Family

Dan and Myia were married on May 4 in Sycamore at the Blumen Gardens which is a nursery and garden store and also has a wonderful gift shop. They also host weddings and have a beautiful courtyard for weddings as well as “the Garden” room which is a great setting for wedding and receptions. Dan and Myia are a fun loving couple and have a lot of fun and friendly family and friends. Their two yearold son was a great flower boy and also insisted on joining in the ceremony. Mom and dad handled it well and he was right there with us for the first half of the ceremony. Grandma stepped in and took care of him for the second half. These guys were great to work with and prepared both funny and very emotionally moving vows for each other. It was a privilege to be a part of their big day.

Toasty Buns

I was the officiant for the wedding ceremony of Grace and Mark on March 24th. The wedding took place at the Bristol on Damen in Chicago. We had the entire upper level and it’s a nice spot for a group of 30 to 40 people. The friends and family of the bride and groom were very fun loving and supportive group. I was positioned less than 2 feet in front of a fireplace that was burning. At one point I leaned over and told both the bride and groom that my ass was getting hot. That brought a smile to their faces and calmed down some of the nervousness that couples often experience during a wedding. This was a great couple to work with and I was glad to be a part of their wedding day!

Harleys, Pizza, and a Wedding

I officiated the wedding for Amy and Jordan on March 24th in Plainfield. The Venue is called Warehouse 109. One of one of the side walls has a dozen vintage Harley and Indian motorcycles on display. The wedding was originally planned to be outside but it was too cold of a March day and inside the warehouse worked out perfectly. A food Vender right outside the main door had a large wood oven and made wood fired pizza to order for the guests. The house was packed with very friendly family and friends.

Wedding and Birthday Fun

I officiated for Art and Michelle at Villa Olivia Olivia this Saturday. Afterwards I hurried to my grandson Gus’s 2nd birthday party! I missed the cake and candles but got back in time to help him play with his new truck! What a fun weekend.

Choosing a Pastor/Officiant for your Wedding

As you plan your time for completing all the tasks on your list of wedding preparations, don’t forget the officiant who will lead you through the actual wedding ceremony.  As soon as you know the date of your wedding it is wise to line up an officiant.  Professionals who are good at this job will have their time filled up quickly, so don’t delay in starting your search.  Here are some things to consider as you think through what you want in your ceremony.

Flexibility

We believe that one of the most important characteristics you need in an officiant for your wedding ceremony is flexibility.

  • Flexibility with Time – A good officiant will need to meet with you at least once to talk through and plan your ceremony.  How flexible is the officiant in terms of availability to meet with you?  If your officiant flexible if you need him there for a wedding rehearsal?
  • Flexible in Style – What sort of wedding ceremony do you want?  Are you thinking a very traditional ceremony or something more contemporary?  Do you want to write your own vows, or would you like someone who can show you a number of options for your to choose from?  Do you want a traditional ring ceremony or would you like to have several choices to look over?  This is YOUR wedding, so it should be the wedding ceremony that YOU want.  Does your officiant understand that and is he/she willing to help you have the wedding ceremony that uniquely fits you as a couple?

Experienced

You want an officiant who is experienced in conducting wedding ceremonies and working with people of all types.

  • Experienced with Weddings – The more experience an officiant has had, the more he will bring to the table in helping you to play your unique wedding.  There are a lot of “moving parts” to a wedding ceremony such as the venue, music, members of the wedding party, family situation, time available for the ceremony, etc.  An experienced officiant will not be thrown off and stuck finding a solution in a unique or unexpected situation.
  • Experienced with People – An experienced officiant will get a quick read on all of the people involved in a wedding.  Wedding ceremonies can set up highly emotional situations in some instances.  Various family members can have strong opinions of different aspects of a wedding ceremony.  An experienced officiant  and will be able to bring calm direction to keep things on track and help the bride and groom receive the wedding ceremony that they want.

Personable

You want an officiant who relates well with people

  • Personable with the Bride and Groom – You want a officiant that you like and feel comfortable with.  This person is going to lead you in making sacred vows to one another and will be introducing you as a newly married couple.  Choose someone with a warm and caring personality.
  • Personable with the VIP Guests – You are likely to have a number of family members and friends involved in the wedding ceremony who are very important to you.  You want an officiant that you feel comfortable introducing to those people and who can carry on a conversation with them and make them feel at ease.

Knowledgeable

You need an officiant with a wide breadth of  knowledge on weddings and wedding ceremonies.

  • Knowledgeable on Wedding Ceremonies – People have been getting married for thousands of years.  Various cultures have developed wedding traditions that add rich meaning and depth to wedding ceremonies.  New ideas also emerge that not only add personal meaning to a wedding ceremony but also help to make it unique for each couple.  An officiant who is knowledgeable about standard traditions as well as current trends will help you to have a wedding ceremony that has your personal stamp on it.

Humor

You need an officiant who has a good and an appropriate sense of humor.

  • Humor in your Wedding Ceremony – While a wedding ceremony is an important, sacred and intensely meaningful event there is often a place for humor as well.  In the midst of the seriousness of the occasion and the nervousness that is often felt, the right touch of humor at the right time can put everyone at ease and help to add to the memories of the day.

Can Go With The Flow

You need an officiant who can go with the flow.

  • Going with the Flow in Rehearsal – If you have a rehearsal for your wedding be prepared for things to start later than you have planned.  Rehearsals are notoriously chaotic events at first.  People get lost, or are stuck in traffic or had to work later then they thought.  An officiant who knows this will work with you, will help bring calm to the situation and will be able to bring order and direction when things are ready to begin.
  • Going with the Flow in the Wedding Ceremony – Despite the hours of careful planning and even with a perfect rehearsal, things can still go differently than planned.  If you are prepared for a minor glitch, a participant who is slightly off cue or some other unforeseen change one of two things will happen.  A sharp officiant will be aware instantly if something is not going as originally planned and can weave it right into the wedding ceremony so that no one even notices.  A sharp officiant will also be able to handle an obvious out of place event in a wedding ceremony, bring some humor to the situation, put everyone at ease and it will end up being a funny memory that added to the day.

Updates and Articles

It’s been a while since I’ve posted. Debbie and I have been very busy lately. Between counseling, meeting with couples, and our office flooding there has been a lot going on. During the recent cold snap some pipes in the sprinkler system at our office froze and burst flooding one of our locations with several inches of water. It’s been a challenge trying to get everything back to normal, but we’re getting through it! Wanted to take a quick moment and share some of our recent articles below. As always I hope you are doing well!

Working with your Spouse(link is external)

Stop Being That Boring Couple and Have Fun Again(link is external)

Save Your Marriage After an Affair(link is external)

Don’t forget to visit our website here

Relationship Coaching and Couples Counseling

Hope you are doing well. We spent a wonderful Thanksgiving at home with our family this year. 3 of our children and 11 of our grandchildren were able to be with us. Our daughter who wasn’t able to be there had a pretty good excuse. She delivered our 13th grandchild a few days after the holiday! We can’t wait for Christmas.

I’ve met with several wonderful couples recently that I’ve been lucky enough to be chosen to officiate for. Really looking forward to planning and officiating their ceremonies. If you are looking for an officiant please reach out quickly as my schedule is beginning to fill up. I always enjoy meeting with new couples.

In other news Debbie and I are really excited to share our new website(link is external) with you. We’re regularly posting marriage and family related content. We hope you find our articles useful and feel free to reach out to us if you’re interested in couples coaching or counseling.

Wishing you all the best this holiday season.

Articles and Events

As usual Debbie and I have been very busy lately. We’ve been to Indiana to help chop wood to keep our grandkids warm this winter, spent some time in Wisconsin, and I’ve been lucky enough to officiate a few Weddings as well. Speaking of which, my schedule is filling up quickly. If you’re looking for an officiant contact me quickly!

Check out VCCs (link is external)latest newsletter, Parenting Boys(link is external), and Being the Best Husband(link is external).

Hope to see some of you at a couple upcoming events Marriage in Crisis Seminar(link is external) and Conflict and Communication Seminar(link is external).

Last wanted to share an inspiring video(link is external) of a good friend of mine from the church we attend while we’re in Wisconsin.