Choosing a Pastor/Officiant for your Wedding

As you plan your time for completing all the tasks on your list of wedding preparations, don’t forget the officiant who will lead you through the actual wedding ceremony.  As soon as you know the date of your wedding it is wise to line up an officiant.  Professionals who are good at this job will have their time filled up quickly, so don’t delay in starting your search.  Here are some things to consider as you think through what you want in your ceremony.


We believe that one of the most important characteristics you need in an officiant for your wedding ceremony is flexibility.

  • Flexibility with Time – A good officiant will need to meet with you at least once to talk through and plan your ceremony.  How flexible is the officiant in terms of availability to meet with you?  If your officiant flexible if you need him there for a wedding rehearsal?
  • Flexible in Style – What sort of wedding ceremony do you want?  Are you thinking a very traditional ceremony or something more contemporary?  Do you want to write your own vows, or would you like someone who can show you a number of options for your to choose from?  Do you want a traditional ring ceremony or would you like to have several choices to look over?  This is YOUR wedding, so it should be the wedding ceremony that YOU want.  Does your officiant understand that and is he/she willing to help you have the wedding ceremony that uniquely fits you as a couple?


You want an officiant who is experienced in conducting wedding ceremonies and working with people of all types.

  • Experienced with Weddings – The more experience an officiant has had, the more he will bring to the table in helping you to play your unique wedding.  There are a lot of “moving parts” to a wedding ceremony such as the venue, music, members of the wedding party, family situation, time available for the ceremony, etc.  An experienced officiant will not be thrown off and stuck finding a solution in a unique or unexpected situation.
  • Experienced with People – An experienced officiant will get a quick read on all of the people involved in a wedding.  Wedding ceremonies can set up highly emotional situations in some instances.  Various family members can have strong opinions of different aspects of a wedding ceremony.  An experienced officiant  and will be able to bring calm direction to keep things on track and help the bride and groom receive the wedding ceremony that they want.


You want an officiant who relates well with people

  • Personable with the Bride and Groom – You want a officiant that you like and feel comfortable with.  This person is going to lead you in making sacred vows to one another and will be introducing you as a newly married couple.  Choose someone with a warm and caring personality.
  • Personable with the VIP Guests – You are likely to have a number of family members and friends involved in the wedding ceremony who are very important to you.  You want an officiant that you feel comfortable introducing to those people and who can carry on a conversation with them and make them feel at ease.


You need an officiant with a wide breadth of  knowledge on weddings and wedding ceremonies.

  • Knowledgeable on Wedding Ceremonies – People have been getting married for thousands of years.  Various cultures have developed wedding traditions that add rich meaning and depth to wedding ceremonies.  New ideas also emerge that not only add personal meaning to a wedding ceremony but also help to make it unique for each couple.  An officiant who is knowledgeable about standard traditions as well as current trends will help you to have a wedding ceremony that has your personal stamp on it.


You need an officiant who has a good and an appropriate sense of humor.

  • Humor in your Wedding Ceremony – While a wedding ceremony is an important, sacred and intensely meaningful event there is often a place for humor as well.  In the midst of the seriousness of the occasion and the nervousness that is often felt, the right touch of humor at the right time can put everyone at ease and help to add to the memories of the day.

Can Go With The Flow

You need an officiant who can go with the flow.

  • Going with the Flow in Rehearsal – If you have a rehearsal for your wedding be prepared for things to start later than you have planned.  Rehearsals are notoriously chaotic events at first.  People get lost, or are stuck in traffic or had to work later then they thought.  An officiant who knows this will work with you, will help bring calm to the situation and will be able to bring order and direction when things are ready to begin.
  • Going with the Flow in the Wedding Ceremony – Despite the hours of careful planning and even with a perfect rehearsal, things can still go differently than planned.  If you are prepared for a minor glitch, a participant who is slightly off cue or some other unforeseen change one of two things will happen.  A sharp officiant will be aware instantly if something is not going as originally planned and can weave it right into the wedding ceremony so that no one even notices.  A sharp officiant will also be able to handle an obvious out of place event in a wedding ceremony, bring some humor to the situation, put everyone at ease and it will end up being a funny memory that added to the day.